The title says it all. We all have experiences (bad and good) in our past that linger in and anchor in our souls. Some are too painful to even bring back up. Some are easy to face and analyze. Some involve people. Others involve situations we got ourselves into.
In my experience, letting things get bottled up for years will affect one’s performance in every aspect of life. First step is to become fully aware of this anchor that drags, kind of like a ship anchor getting stuck in the sludge and garbage and dragging it along with the ship. And be completely honest about it. No sense lying to yourself. Face it, it was that lying to yourself that got you to this uncomfortable place already! I find that writing this down helps, and if there is someone or people who are directly or indirectly involved in making you feel this way include their name too.
Then, ask yourself what you are feeling? Is it anger? Or sorrow? Maybe it is guilt? Name your emotion! And find out what, who, where compels you to feel this way. Most of the time it is just YOU and your perception, or it may be a certain person.
Next is the importance of acknowledging the fact that you are entitled to feel what you feel. Grant yourself that and be comfortable with giving yourself the right to feel what you are feeling. A good friend of mine taught me that.
Then, you need to confront that feeling through communication. It may involve writing something to the person who ignites that feeling and as calmly as you can let them know that you are feeling that way. Or it may be that you need to analyze your own perceptions and change an environment that you have created for yourself that needs changing.
I can not emphasize communication enough. If the person who was the instigator of those feelings does not acknowledge your right to feel what you are feeling after several communications then you have done all you can and this allows you to let go of the feeling that has weighted you down. And therein lies the absolute gem:
It is easy to hold onto something that gives you a purpose to keep yourself occupied but you have no idea what letting go allows you to do. It is simply the key paving your way to your successful future!
Of course, there is so much more to this than what I have described here and I plan to write more about it. I hope this opens up a way for you to have an internal dialogue to help you sort and organize some of your own thoughts.
I should add that many stumbling blocks require consultation with others who are impartial such as personal coaches as well as medical professionals in case there are deeper issues that need to be dealt with. Remember, there is always help you just have to make a decision to seek it!
As always to your health and success in all your dreams and thoughts,