Becoming a father has taught me a few lessons. It’s a 24 hour a day, 7 day a week job for those of us who embrace it.
Here are a few of them,
You Fail at it everyday, you win at it everyday but you Feel your child’s pain as well as the joy.
You are never Above anyone else, especially your partner and your child–you guide and lead when you have to but you are not Above them.
You have to have and search for the Answers to the easiest questions (even if they are asked a thousand times in a day) or the toughest ones that you may not have any– where you may have to do some serious soul-searching and may never find your own answers.
You Take your child on a journey of learning every moment that you have with them and soon you realize that you have been Taken on a much more meaningful journey by them. You learn your child’s language, fantasies and ability to find solutions.
When life does not pan out the way you had envisioned, You never Take advantage of the relationship or use your child to benefit yourself. NEVER! In fact, you are There for your child, rain or shine, you are there…. your work does not matter.
Your Epiphany comes to you in a dream or a day-dream when you least expect it……. it is this,
The best investment is not reflected in what you have, or how much you’ve made but
the Time you spent,
not the Time you wished you had spent with your child.
Nothing will ever recapture that Time.
It passes regardless of your choices.
You Help your partner and your child even if you don’t believe in what they are doing. Because it is not about you but about what makes them Happy– that act alone comes from the Heart. Each father has a Heart and he shows his love differently, not so much with words but with actions.
You lend an Ear to the complaints, to the tantrums, to the cries of pain or the expression of Elation, the celebration of successes even the sound of the calm breaths while your child sleeps. You use you Eyes and see a mirror in your child’s Eyes, in front of you, keeping your Emotions and actions in check.
At first, you Read life to your child. Then, you Read life with you child and at last your child Reads about life to you. You Review your life every night. Rewind to see where you thought that you had taught a lesson yet you Realize that you were taught one…. or two… or three. And at the end you Remember that it was all worth it because as a result of a decision, a union, you have become a better human being.
Happy Fathers’ day as well as Mothers’ day (especially those single mothers who had to also be fathers to their children)
As always to your health and success in all your dreams and thoughts,
Kaveh N. Adel, D.D.S. Personal Development and Life Coach
P.E.R.S.E.K.A. Personal “Purpose” Education Restoring Self Empowerment through Knowledge and Action